I woke up, sweating. Blanket twisted around my body like a starving python. The digital numbers on the watch blinked curiously at me as I fought for freedom in my bed. My fighting feet reached the soft coat of Ville and he grunted quietly at me but didn’t move. I managed to get free but nearly fell out of bed in the process. Frustrated and still with the nightmare fresh in my mind I ungracefully roll off the mattress and get up. The floor is so cold it’s like walking on needles. My legs are aching from cramp and I feel parched. Entering the kitchen, I step in something wet. I give Ville an angry stare where I try to balance on one foot and even if he avoids meeting my eyes, his ears drops a bit. Cursing, I fill up a glass of water and walks back – stepping in the puddle again. I drop down in bed and wipe my feet off on Ville who growls and leaves bed. While he crawls in under it, I tell him that’s what happens when he pees inside. He squabbles from underneath the bed, clearly not agreeing. I ignore him, empty the glass and try to get comfortable again. The sheets are already cold against my skin, I’m freezing and the muscles in my legs are so tense it feels like they’ll burst any second. I turn around to the side, tries to get the blanket nice and tight around my feet. It gets too hot. I kick it off, turn to the other side. Too cold. I start all over again. Then I have to pee. This time I’m able to miss the puddle on the kitchen floor. I do a victory pose as I pass through the hallway. At the door to the bathroom I close my eyes, turn the light on and counts to 10. The light is still blinding. I’d pee in the dark but the mirror scares me. God knows what might be inside it. I try to flush as quietly as possible but it ends up sounding like a freaking bomb detonating. It feels like everyone in the building will wake up now. After breathing a few times, telling myself no one heard it, I enter a staring contest with the tap. I have to wash my hands, but the water will be freezing cold. I’m already freezing. My feet are aching from the cold. I’m shivering where I’m standing in my pyjamas. I turn the tap on and stick a finger into the water. Yep, freezing cold. I close my eyes and endure. Quick, quick, quick, fucking cold. I try to get some sort of life back into my hands by frenetically scrubbing them against the towel. Barely working. I turn off the light, gives the mirror the finger and bounces back through the kitchen – and steps into the puddle. Some really bad words crosses my lips as I try shake off the worst while bouncing the last bit back to bed. As I leap onto bed, I’m nearly crushing Ninja who’s taken over the pillows. I poke her belly. She doesn’t even look at me. I poke her belly a bit harder. She snores louder. I try to shove her fat ass away but she magically goes from 14 kg to 14 ton. Defeated, I roll up in my blanket and lies down on the edge of the mattress, without pillows. Behind me, she lets out a pleasant sigh. The numbers on the watch stares at me and I stare back. It’s taunting me, indirectly. I find it very offensive. Turning around, I get a mouthful of dog fur. Trying again to shove her away, she simply kicks me in the face with her stumps. Grumbling, I crawl down the bed and close my eyes. I count sheep. 1 sheep, jumping over the fence. A second sheep coming thereafter. A third sheep with a corgi shortly after. The fourth is a corgi trying to get over the fence. I open my eyes and find Ville trying to get up in bed. I call him things and tells him to fix it himself. He gives me a long sad stare with puppy eyes and with a sigh I help him up. He lies down next to me, rolls over and turns into a pile of heaviness. I barely have any blanket left, as most of it has been taken over by Ville. I try to pull some back but it’s like trying to put a collar on a mountain and drag it with you on a nice jog. It won’t budge. I try to fit under the piece of blanket I have left, like a giant trying to fit under a handkerchief. Shuddering and aching, with feet smelling of dog pee and an alarm clock that’s mocking me, I spend another night cursing the whole thing called sleeping.